Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Turkey - carb fest is done!

OMG did I eat...and eat....and eat....and..whoa...was that something tasty ...yup I ate that too!

Good news is I stayed above my own personal yellow line: 195! 

I would love to have blogged that I was good and didn't over indulge...but I did.  I did buy a Tur-Duck-Hen and had it shipped to TX, my sister-in-law is a little leery about cooking a turkey.  As for the TDH...not worth the money.  It was tasty, just not what I paid for it from costco.com.  Next time, when we go to TX, I think I'll take over the sides as well.  I can't do a side of carbs with a side of carbs and a side of carbs oooo and those veggies...why they are covered in mushroom soup. 

Thank god I left all of the left overs in TX that way I don't have to see it in my fridge tempting me with their naughty little voices!

I'm still trying to convince my sister to just throw away her left over cake/pie/cookies.  There will be no Turkey Fairy that comes and gives her a rash.  No one will judge her, especially since all her in laws LEFT ALL THE DARN FOOD at her house and didn't take any home.  What does one do with two vats of mash potatoes? ... the trash!

Sunday I went back on Atkins (except the ice cream that fell into my mouth at the gas station!) and I've lost the 2 pounds I had gained from my unintentional carb fest in TX. 

My own personal goal is to get down to 190 by new years, 3 pounds in 5 weeks...that seems do-able! 

Onward and downward!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

#4, #3, #2 & #1

This is what happens when you leave your list out where a 2 year old can get at it! you have to rewrite the whole darn thing!  So on the last day of our first 40 week diet bet:

#4 - Don't try and start a diet when you have lost someone dear to you or something else life altering.  Although the death of a close one may kick start the weight loss (because who wants to eat when someone has died) I don't feel like I was in the right frame of mind after my friend died that I could even think about dieting.  It was enough to get through the day for me.  I think this goes for all other major changes but also for depression.  It is damn hard to focus on a diet when you are depressed and feeling stuck.  The last leg of this 40 weeks have been darn hard and I know I've been frustrated/ depressed/ sad/ lonely and my diet suffered greatly.  I think these periods of our lives that are in the valleys are there for us to take stock of our lives and figure out what is important.  This is not a free ticket to eat what ever the he[[ you want to eat but permission to be kind to yourself.

On a lighter note....
#3 EXERCISE - trust me - after awhile your body will crave it, take it from this coach potato it does!  As odd as it may seem, I crave moving around.  A year ago, I would have been happy to let my husband rake the lawn and collect all of the leaves.  Yesterday, I went out and not only raked and bagged leaves, but I was the one who INITIATED it! imagine that!  I feel better able to handle the stressers that come my way when I exercise but also I have NOT been all BIGGEST looser about my exercise.  The beginning of my 40 week bet, I would do 20-30 (more often than not just 20) minutes on the wii.  After awhile I didn't feel like I was getting enough so I switched to the tread mill and walked for 20-30 minutes a day (more often than not at least 30).  I did NOT spend hours upon hours at the gym (Sorry Jillian!).  I do have 2 kids at home and a fabulous hubby and I've lost 50+ pounds at a reasonable pace!

I was having a conversation with my aunt, who was a nurse, and she believes that exercise has a 5 day window.  This means that you shouldn't go more than 5 days without exercising because, in her opinion, your body gets used to being sluggish and it is harder to kick start it again.  This is why the 10 week exercise bet (3-4X a week) then there is no way to hit that 5 day slug fest.  Now it is possible to be lazy and exercise the last 3 days of the week and give yourself the first 4 off.  The weeks that I did this the more stable my weight was and the less it went down.

#2 All or Nothing Usually Means Nothing-
This quote comes from Dr. Phil and even though I don't ever really watch him this saying has stayed with me for a long time.  I can't tell you how often I would start a diet on Monday and then by Wednesday I would cheat and then I would just throw in the towel for the rest of the diet.  ONE itty bitty cheat would hurl me into a spiral of bigger and bigger cheats...and the flip side of those cheats was a nasty case of shame and belittling of myself.  This was one of my biggest lessons to learn, even if you have a naughty lunch that does not mean you can fall off of your diet, pick yourself up, dust your self off and then try again.  You have the rest of the day to make good, because the rest of your life is going to be filled with temptations and cheats and life that just gets in the way.  No diet is perfect and I had to learn to model my life and diet together.  Now if I start talking about dogs that won't hunt...please slap me upside the head!

I asked Gretchen what lessons she learned and her #2 was EAT MORE VEGGIES, the are good for you and tasty too.  Holly's #2 lesson was sometimes a dog knows how to take care of you better than you know how to take care of yourself.

My last lesson goes along with #2 and it is forgiveness-
This lesson I have to remember daily.  There are a couple of things I need to remind myself about forgiveness. You need to forgive yourself for becoming as large and as unhappy as you did because that person is not you any more.  That person had trouble dealing with life, you have learned better.  I have to forgive myself for cheating occasionally.  In the beginning I didn't let myself cheat at ALL.  I was mad at myself for days because I'd had a small piece of bread! a piece of bread for the love of all that is holy!  When I was prepared for events such as holiday parties, teacher's lounges filled with food and other things that I knew I couldn't eat I would prepare a mantra for the day and that worked very well, when food was sprung on me and I didn't have an option that was in my diet, I tried to eat the healthiest that was available and forgive myself for not being prepared or what ever nonsense I was trying to shame/blame myself.  I also have to remember to forgive people with their well meaning sabotages or comments, because they are not in the same place I am with my mental diet health.

Gretchen's #1 lesson is exercise...without it she would not have lost the 35 pounds she has lost these last 40 weeks.
Holly's #1 lesson learned...a dog can save your life.  She's lost 25 pounds.

Total pounds lost in 40 weeks 35 (Gretchen) + 25 (Holly) and 53 (Me) = 113!

Our plan is to start another diet pact on January 10th and so we don't gain back too much weight between now and then, a $50 buy in if we gain more than 3 pounds before the 10th.  We are going to do a 10 week on 1 week off style bet similar to the exercise bet.  I think the 40 weeks was a good idea because it made us think in terms that were longer than a quick fix, but by week 38 we were done!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Lessons learned #5 & #6

#6 - Mantras
Mantras are a great thing to have when you need SOMETHING to keep you going.  In the beginning, I would use Dori's line from Finding Nemo; Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.  I would hum it to myself when ever I was feeling like I couldn't do what I needed to get done that day or the whole diet pact seemed a tad overwhelming.  I also liked, "It won't taste as good as skinny will feel?" and I would say it with the question mark because I don't remember what skinny feels like! But I've got a great imagination ;) I can remember waaaaaaaaaaaay back in high school when I would run for PE, I would get a good rhythm going and then repeat to myself, "makes me stronger, makes me stronger!" One of the bigger mantras I have will be a lesson on to itself, but now I'm thinking I need a new one so that I can get myself through the holidays without gaining!

#5 Meal Planning
I hate meal planning.  I would love to just come home and slap something together.  This does NOT work! it doesn't, I end up eating something with more calories or more carbs than I wanted and worse my children end up eating more crappy foods when I don't plan ahead.  A typical day for me is two poached eggs and two pieces of sausage (3 carbs, less than 300 calories), lunch is usually left overs from the night before or roughly a protien with some veggies.  Sometimes I get fancy and cut up lunch meat, string cheese, a tomatoe, some cucumber and some black olives and put it bento style in a small container and take a little dressing.  Snack is usually some nuts or string cheese (if I haven't had any for lunch), sugar free jello or a low carb bar.  Dinner is usually some type of protein and veggies.  For the kids & hubby I add in some fruit and some starches in moderation.  I would love to get to the point that I could meal plan for more than 2 - 3 days in advance.  I was very diligent in the beginning and planned out my meals and snacks every day for the whole week.  Now, it is more like 2-3 days with a sketchy idea for the 4th day.  Meal planning, is essential for dieting success.  This way you won't be stuck with 2 screaming children and NO IDEA what to make and then give in to the drive through. 

My sister and I have made what we call Meal Kits in our pantries.  We have the basics for several meals put together near each other.  This way we can make taco salad or pasta when we want to and it is easy to make a list because we know what we will use and what is missing from our kits.  I was lucky enough to have a CSA (Community Supported Agriculture) basket every week that came with all sorts of fresh veggies and fruits.  Sometimes too much and I threw out more than I wanted to until I figured out how to freeze the uneaten veggies.  The CSA made meal planning difficult because we got the basket on Saturdays and that meant that I had to make a plan of what to do AFTER we got it which made the weekends a little screwy.  Hoo boy am I off topic. 

Meal Planning and Mantras...they help, believe me!

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

#8 & #7

Lesson #8 - Peer Pressure

I didn't realize how much I over ate when I was in social settings until I decided to cut my carb intake drastically.  When I looked at how I would eat at those times, I realized the social pressure to eat and the peer pressure to eat was larger than I had expected.  I have been to lunch with different people who want to share or ask if I want some of their food.  I would politely say, "no thanks, I'm full," or "No thanks, I'm good."  I am amazed how many times I got asked when I was finished.  I kept thinking, am I looking at their food like a begging dog?  So, then I made sure to look them in the eye or let my gaze look around the restaurant.  I felt very proud of myself that I could be a broken record and keep saying, "No thank you," without feeling like I hurt anyone's feelings.  I think that people feel nervous when you are dieting and not eating as much as they are eating.  The lesson I learned is to keep saying no, politely.  If they keep it up the pestering, it is their issue not mine. :)

Lesson #7 - Nay Sayers
When you are on a diet like Atkins, there are A LOT of Nay Sayers.  Everyone has an opinion and I do mean everyone!  After having lost 53 pounds people will ask, "What are you doing?" and I tell them, "I have a diet pact and exercise bet."  When they ask are you following a certain plan? I am always hesitant to say I'm doing Atkins, because it is a very mixed bag of responses I get from other people.  Some people nod, other people clench their jaws, and some even tell me how unhealthy it is for me to be on Atkins.  I usually tell them, I have never eaten as many veggies as I have while I'm on Atkins.  This usually makes them either let it go or continue on an anti-Atkins diatribe.  I try not to let these kinds of Nay Sayers bother me because I have never felt healthier than when I follow Atkins.  I say if you find a diet that works for you (Atkins, south beach, Blood Type, Weight Watchers) then do it!  It is your journey of weight loss not theirs!  Now I'm not saying follow something blindly, do your own research as to what is best for you, but if it is something you can maintain for the long haul then do it, I don't think I'll ever go back to the way I ate before, never.  This doesn't mean I won't have cheats every now and then, but when I finally get down to my goal weight I will follow Atkins for the rest of my life. 

Here are the pictures of our 5K from this last weekend
The one of the three of us (Me, my sister Gretchen, & Holly) is before the race.  The one by myself is my sillyness about having done the 5K!  Holly and I were so excited we decided we were going to do the one in December too!  We walked a 5k in under 50 minutes and we ran the last little bit of the 5K.  We've decided to just add more running each time we do a 5K. 

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Lessons learned #10 & # 9

#10 Before you start give your self at least 3 weeks to prepare.  This happened inadvertently for me,we were going to try the first week of February, but hubby was still overseas and I decided I just couldn't do it until he got back, I was too overwhelmed.  So, to make those three weeks count, I decided I would do several things to get ready for my diet.  The first was to eat all the food that I knew I wouldn't be eating on my diet.  I hate wasting money and if you have the food why not use it.  If it is too much for you give it to a food bank, but I ended up using most of the food that I had in the house that I wouldn't be using for my diet.  The second thing I did was try and really look at the 'why' I was eating.  I tried to ask myself one question when I was putting food into my mouth and that was: "Are you hungry or is it something else?" Most of the time I could figure it out and if I was stressed, I tried to put the food away and do something physical like take the kids for a walk around the block.  There were several times when I had the kids put down to bed, clothes laid out for the next day, lunches packed and I would start shoveling food into my mouth.  I couldn't figure out why so I let myself eat what ever it was.  Then it happened again the next night, and the next.  I asked a friend and she said, sometimes moms are so regimented in their day that when they don't have something to do they feel anxiety and then fill that hole with food.  LIGHT BULB time!  So when I started to feel that anxiety, I'd go surf the net! 

The reason I let myself have that time was because I didn't want to work really hard to lose weight only to have it pile on again.  How many times have we lost weight only to watch it creep back on.  I think it is because we didn't solve the reasons we were putting that food into our mouths in the first place.  There was a time I was considering gastric bypass surgery as an option for my obesity.  Then I found out that about half of the people who chop up their insides gain all the weight back and that terrified me! Who knows what missing most of your stomach and some intestines will do to you by the time you are 90, and then it was no guarantee that you would keep the weight off! that scared the heck out of me! so I really wanted to figure out the whys and the three weeks I let myself prepare were a life saver.  There is a line in the Cinderella Pact by Sarah Strohmeyer where she talks about a revelation by the main character about how people loose the weight by they don't focus on the parts that are inside their thinking that made them fat in the first place and they gain the weight back.  I didn't want that for myself.

#9 Have a Buddy System
I can't tell you how many times Holly and Gretchen have saved my diet.  They have talked me off the ledge of driving to the store for my personal gate way drug (ice cream) they have inspired me with their ability to stick to their own exercise routine.  I think of them as my "sponsors" like I am an alcoholic, they have saved me.  My husband has always been helpful and after training him not to act like my dad (woops) he has been a great support as well.  However, he is a boy and sometimes they *just* don't understand!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

#12 Office Parties & #11 Non Food rewards

#12 Office Parties
I'm a teacher and teachers like to have lots of food lying around.  We usually have quarterly breakfasts, Holiday luncheons, monthly birthday celebrations, and some of us will just bake and then bring by batches of cookies and what not and leave them in the lounge.  Very difficult when you are dieting!  So, I had two plans of attack.  Before a birthday celebration I would say to myself, "it's not worth eating that because when I step on the scale I don't want to fret!" or "its not going to taste as good as skinny will feel!"  This worked!  My second plan was to always sign up for the luncheons that way I knew that I would have SOMETHING to eat!  I usually signed up for the veggie tray because that way I could fill up on veggies.  If it was a breakfast, I made an egg dish.  It was too difficult, for me, to just opt out of the luncheons, I don't know why.  So, I would just make sure I made something I could eat.

#11 Non Food rewards
In my family, food is a reward.  Oh, you accomplished X,Y or Z let's go out to eat.  When I was a kid, you got a good report card, let's get a sundae.  I know that this is an oldy but I finally think I learned this lesson.  When I lost %10 of my body weight, I went and had a really nice pedicure and my eyebrows done.  When I broke through through the 200's I decided I was going to pay someone (FOREVER) to get rid of my grey hair and have a nice hair cut with it!  So I had better stay under 200 for the rest of my life!  :)  When I break through 183 and finally reach the "overweight" stage versus the "obese" stage, I think I'll get some nice (real) leather boots!  When I break through the 159 which would put me into the NORMAL range, I am going to go out and buy some expensive jeans.  I could never figure out why people would spend over 40 bucks on a pair of jeans!  So, I figure I am going to go try them on and see what all the fuss is about!  I was thinking maybe a 100 dollar pair of jeans (see even when I reward myself I get a little cheap because I see a lot of 400 dollar jeans {egads people spend your money elsewhere!})

Oh, and my last thought of the morning, last night I was walking around in my work out clothes after working out and I kept stepping on the hem of my workout pants.  I was getting irritated and then I realized my thighs have shrunk and so my pants are longer.  Irritation....totally disappeared! heheheh!

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

#13 Restaurants

Order food how you want it!  Restaurants are service oriented businesses.  They are here to provide us with a service.  If you were allergic to something you’d make sure to ask if the allergen was in the food, why not order it the way you need it prepared.  This doesn’t mean be a prima donna about your food, just ask for the substitutions you need.  I will say that when I felt a little weird about what I’m asking the kitchen to do, I'd lie.  I'd say I’m allergic to gluten or that I’m a diabetic, but this was only very very rarely that I felt the need to lie.    I think it was half way through this bet that I just stopped lying and started asking for what I wanted without the guilt.  Never have I had to change my order, the wait staff have always been very nice and given me my burger no bun with a side salad no croutons!  I think we have to stop feeling like we’re hurting their feelings or that we are imposing on them to make it the way we want it to be prepared.  It’s your food, you are paying for it, get it the way you want it!

Monday, November 8, 2010

14. Fantasy vs. Reality

With only 14 days left I decided I would do a lesson learned each day.  Here is #14:

Fantasy vs. Reality – my brain would love my body to be a size 2; however my body knows that that is just impossible.  My brain would love for me to lose 2-3 pounds a week because by that math I would be 100 pounds lighter by the time the 40 weeks were up; my body knows that is impossible.  My brain says, “Ah, you skip a meal and you’ll be fine,” my body knows differently!   This is why Gretchen, Holly and I set a reasonable goal of a pound a week, and with the understanding that some weeks we wouldn’t make that goal.  We knew that life would get in the way of weight loss and we were trying to change our way of living rather than crash and burn dieting.

Now I lost my last two week bet and thus owe $20 bucks.  I'm determined to not lose this last two week bet.  Although, the 2 Reese's Peanut Butter cups are not helping!  

14 days left! 

Friday, November 5, 2010

15 days - 3 groups of 5

Yesterday, I meant to post...and then didn't get around to it.  So, now onto today:

Breakfast - boys wanted eggs so I scrambled up a bunch and we had a lovely breakfast
Lunch - smooth as pie, because I packed it the night before
Snack - almonds while waiting for oven to heat up and chatting on the phone...woops how many did I eat, I need to remember not to eat, chat and cook...too many calories I am sure
Dinner - half veggies and 4 spicy wings not to shabby
Exercise - nope too pooped after today, I had the best of intentions and packed a work out bag too

scale - looks like Monday...sigh.  Onward and Downward!

I have been thinking of the top ten things the three of us have learned during these 40 weeks and I will post that soon.

My plan for the weekend: no grocery shopping while hungry and no cooking and chatting and snacking! :)  Oh! and a work out as well :)

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

18 more to go!

Ok! I should know not to go to the market when you are hungry.  I was going to pick up 3 staple items...I spent 40 bucks and snacked my whole way home in the car...naughty naughty!  next time remember not to go hungry!

Breakfast - superb!
Lunch - made it the night before
Snack...um...see above
Dinner - homecooked and what I planned kilbasa, mushrooms, onions and brocoli delish!

Exercise - Check
Scale - ok...not great but ok :) I am due for that gal that comes around once a month, which is why I might have been so darn hungry (I get vicious attacks of the starving, dying, starving at this lovely time of the month!)

We'll see how tomorrow goes!  I am not going to beat myself up, just accept and move on!

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

19 more wake ups!

This is the way the describe it in the military, because you have so many people on different shifts, so I have 19 more wake ups on our diet pact.

Breakfast - excellent
Lunch - ate too much but still remained true to diet guide lines
Dinner - ate a small dinner to compensate for bigger lunch
No exercise today because I ran a bunch of errands (voting being one of them)
Scale - is my friend today! :)

looking forward to tomorrow!

Monday, November 1, 2010

20 days left

Breakfast - right on track!
Lunch - packed it the night before
Snack - was prepared with a box of acceptable snacks at school
Dinner - Joseph said he wanted eggs, so we had scrambled eggs, sausage and I had brussel sprouts too
After dinner Halloween candy - NONE!

Yay me!
Scale - not my friend today (but who could blame it after I was not on track last week)