Day 1 - again...attempt number 3,492

Question of the week: Why am I even dieting?

It would be so much easier to just eat what I wanted to, not get up in the morning and exercise, and keep buying larger and larger clothing.  I can see easily falling into a self made trap of sitting on the couch, watching TV and eating handful after handful of what ever I wanted to eat.  It is easy.  It is comfortable. It feels safe.  I don't have to face what is bothering me when I do this but it has ugly ramifications.  Self anesthetizing myself with food is an old habit. 

Why do I want to change?

  1. I don't like the way I feel 

  2. I don't want to wear tight jeans 

  3. I want to run again

  4. I don't want to pass these habits on to the boys

  5. I don't like seeing the scale inch up and up and up

  6. I want to not be in the obese category anymore

  7. I don't want to feel guilty anymore

  8. I want to feel normal in my own skin rather than slightly itchy

  9. I want the outside to match the inside 

10. I don't want a muffin top that feels (to me) like a cake top

11. I don't want to feel tired

12. I want to be a good model for my children

13. I want to run the entire 5K without stopping

14. I want to get rid of the monkey on my back that whispers ... "one bite...what could it hurt!"

15. I want to feel strong

16. I don't want to be afraid

17. I want to know why I feel afraid

18. I don't want to feel disengaged

19. I want to be around for as long as the universe has planned and not curtail it by my choices

20. I don't want to feel heartsick anymore

2 weeks to go and almost there!

We have 14 days left until our March 25th weigh in and a couple of things happened.  My sister had two weeks where she was surrounded by really non-diet food and gained some weight.  She calculated that she would have to eat 1200 calories a day to lose the weight she had gained/needed to lose to meet the 25th of March deadline.  So, I told her I would do the 1200 calories a day, My Fitness pal says I should be around 1450 to lose a half a pound to a pound a week.  Oh My Goodness, the first couple of days I was STARVING.  But the results have been pleasant.  So, as of this morning I have only .6 pounds to lose to make my bet.  OH Yeah!!!

Then, I decided to take my 2 days off of exercising consecutively, I took Monday and then took Tuesday off...and it bled into taking Wednesday off...and then Friday off....egads! The Exercise Trap; when you are exercising on a regular basis you feel WONDERFUL and then when you take a couple days off (my limit seems to be 2 days in a row) and then I want to become a sloth and BFFs with my Tivo remote.  When I exercise, no I didn't say if I said when, I will have only exercised three times this week for only 20 minutes each.  Which is really sad because I was going on a 4 week streak of 5 times each with at LEAST 45 but more like an hour of experiencing!

So, my goals for this week are to get back to exercising and try and lose at least a pound so that I will be under my goal and have a little bit of buffer.

3 pounds down + 3 more to go

I have 22 days left until the March 25th quarterly weigh in.  Recently my sister and I decided that we would do a side bet...hmm...I guess it isn't a bet per say but rather a extra added something.  We decided we would exercise 5 days a week and if we could make 5 YAY if we couldn't at least try for 4.  So I dusted off my Hiit (High intensity interval training) or Cross Fit journal and decided I would do 15ish minutes of that and 45 minutes of tread mill at least 4 times a week and 5th exercise could be one or the other or both depending on how my body felt like I could handle.  Well, I immediately gained 4 pounds....bleck.  That was 3 weeks ago.  Last Monday I gave myself a goal of loosing 2 pounds because I need to lose 2 pounds a week to get to my weigh in requirement otherwise I will owe a political party $100 ....not good.

The results = 3 pounds lost oh yeah!

This week's goal (with 22 days left) 2 pounds and exercise 5X this week.

If all goes as planned, by next Monday (with 14 days left) I will be at my weigh in weight which will give me the last 2 weeks to get in a couple of buffer pounds.  I do NOT want to what happened on the New Year's Eve weigh in to happen again.  For days I had my 3 - 4 pound buffer and then on the day of the weigh in I was up 4 pounds...STRESSFUL!

Here's to hoping that the adage "counting your chickens before they hatch" doesn't come true in the next 22 days! Murphy go find someone else to play with!

3 Year Anniversary!

Yesterday was the 3 year anniversary of this blog / this diet pact.  Wow! And for some disappointing news...yeah...I was up to 200.3 this morning.  pffft...

Almost 3 years

On Tuesday it will be 3 years since I started this diet pact.  I have managed to keep off 50+ pounds in 3 years. I have exercised more in the last 3 years than the previous 10 (most likely, because I didn't keep track).

This week I hit an all time low (for this month) at 196, so I was one pound away from my 5 pound goal for the 25th of March.  This morning I'm back up to 197.2 so the scale sucks.... and I looked back and since the 3rd of this month I've lost....a half a pound.  Meh.  Or maybe I should look at it as; I haven't gained anything! even through Valentine's Day!

I have 5 weeks left until the 25th of March and I want to be well below the 195 range so there will be no 5 am surprises!

My goals this week are to exercise 5 times (which I did last week) and log my food for at least 5 days and be honest about what I eat.  There is no skipping hard work and watching what you eat.... nope none. sigh.

I am excited that it has been almost 3 years and I'm excited that I've kept off 50+ pounds.  I am looking forward to this week exercise and diet because I know I can do it.

Now, I'm off to buy cupcakes for my hubby's birthday.  My personal goal for that is to only eat half of one. Yes, it can be done.  I've done it before. :)

This Last Week

I made my goal of 4X of exercising and I lost .9 pounds.  However, this morning (Thursday) I was up 1.1....bleck.

This week I intend to lose ? and exercise 5 times this week.  I've already done it twice so I've got three more times to go.

I want to lose be a pound lower than I was at the end of this last week but I fell face first into some chocolate on Valentine's day.... and with that 1.1 up I will just do what I can to be reasonable the rest of the week.

OH! and for LENT I have given up snacking after I put the boys to bed.  I use that time to totally nosh out on food, not sure why.  I don't need it but I do it, so that is what this non-catholic is doing to give up a crutch and find something else to lean on.

Exercised...weight meh

I got in 4X of exercising, my eating...on about Friday I took a dive into Carb Land...and Pulled myself out very very slowly.  I have done "well" today.  I haven't stepped on the scale.  :(  yes there is fear involved.  Tomorrow is soon enough to get onto that scale.  Maybe I'll post tomorrow the results.

My new goal is to exercise 5X which means I will take off Monday and Friday and exercise the rest of the days.  Wish me luck :) I did it before I can do it again.