#4 - Don't try and start a diet when you have lost someone dear to you or something else life altering. Although the death of a close one may kick start the weight loss (because who wants to eat when someone has died) I don't feel like I was in the right frame of mind after my friend died that I could even think about dieting. It was enough to get through the day for me. I think this goes for all other major changes but also for depression. It is damn hard to focus on a diet when you are depressed and feeling stuck. The last leg of this 40 weeks have been darn hard and I know I've been frustrated/ depressed/ sad/ lonely and my diet suffered greatly. I think these periods of our lives that are in the valleys are there for us to take stock of our lives and figure out what is important. This is not a free ticket to eat what ever the he[[ you want to eat but permission to be kind to yourself.
On a lighter note....
#3 EXERCISE - trust me - after awhile your body will crave it, take it from this coach potato it does! As odd as it may seem, I crave moving around. A year ago, I would have been happy to let my husband rake the lawn and collect all of the leaves. Yesterday, I went out and not only raked and bagged leaves, but I was the one who INITIATED it! imagine that! I feel better able to handle the stressers that come my way when I exercise but also I have NOT been all BIGGEST looser about my exercise. The beginning of my 40 week bet, I would do 20-30 (more often than not just 20) minutes on the wii. After awhile I didn't feel like I was getting enough so I switched to the tread mill and walked for 20-30 minutes a day (more often than not at least 30). I did NOT spend hours upon hours at the gym (Sorry Jillian!). I do have 2 kids at home and a fabulous hubby and I've lost 50+ pounds at a reasonable pace!
I was having a conversation with my aunt, who was a nurse, and she believes that exercise has a 5 day window. This means that you shouldn't go more than 5 days without exercising because, in her opinion, your body gets used to being sluggish and it is harder to kick start it again. This is why the 10 week exercise bet (3-4X a week) then there is no way to hit that 5 day slug fest. Now it is possible to be lazy and exercise the last 3 days of the week and give yourself the first 4 off. The weeks that I did this the more stable my weight was and the less it went down.
#2 All or Nothing Usually Means Nothing-
This quote comes from Dr. Phil and even though I don't ever really watch him this saying has stayed with me for a long time. I can't tell you how often I would start a diet on Monday and then by Wednesday I would cheat and then I would just throw in the towel for the rest of the diet. ONE itty bitty cheat would hurl me into a spiral of bigger and bigger cheats...and the flip side of those cheats was a nasty case of shame and belittling of myself. This was one of my biggest lessons to learn, even if you have a naughty lunch that does not mean you can fall off of your diet, pick yourself up, dust your self off and then try again. You have the rest of the day to make good, because the rest of your life is going to be filled with temptations and cheats and life that just gets in the way. No diet is perfect and I had to learn to model my life and diet together. Now if I start talking about dogs that won't hunt...please slap me upside the head!
I asked Gretchen what lessons she learned and her #2 was EAT MORE VEGGIES, the are good for you and tasty too. Holly's #2 lesson was sometimes a dog knows how to take care of you better than you know how to take care of yourself.
My last lesson goes along with #2 and it is forgiveness-
This lesson I have to remember daily. There are a couple of things I need to remind myself about forgiveness. You need to forgive yourself for becoming as large and as unhappy as you did because that person is not you any more. That person had trouble dealing with life, you have learned better. I have to forgive myself for cheating occasionally. In the beginning I didn't let myself cheat at ALL. I was mad at myself for days because I'd had a small piece of bread! a piece of bread for the love of all that is holy! When I was prepared for events such as holiday parties, teacher's lounges filled with food and other things that I knew I couldn't eat I would prepare a mantra for the day and that worked very well, when food was sprung on me and I didn't have an option that was in my diet, I tried to eat the healthiest that was available and forgive myself for not being prepared or what ever nonsense I was trying to shame/blame myself. I also have to remember to forgive people with their well meaning sabotages or comments, because they are not in the same place I am with my mental diet health.
Gretchen's #1 lesson is exercise...without it she would not have lost the 35 pounds she has lost these last 40 weeks.
Holly's #1 lesson learned...a dog can save your life. She's lost 25 pounds.
Total pounds lost in 40 weeks 35 (Gretchen) + 25 (Holly) and 53 (Me) = 113!
Our plan is to start another diet pact on January 10th and so we don't gain back too much weight between now and then, a $50 buy in if we gain more than 3 pounds before the 10th. We are going to do a 10 week on 1 week off style bet similar to the exercise bet. I think the 40 weeks was a good idea because it made us think in terms that were longer than a quick fix, but by week 38 we were done!
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Keenly Kristin